Did this meme template from twitter with ma boiii
click for a close up!
if i had to get in a fistfight with any member of the fellowship it would be Frodo because i would easily win
all i am saying is that he would ostensibly be the easiest one to take on in a fight given that he’s like three feet tall and has led a life of (physical) leisure compared to all of the others due to his standing as a gentlehobbit
legolas, aragorn, and gimli are all used to combat, sam works as a gardener, merry and pippin often gallivant off and get into mischief so they have the advantage of experience in whatever it is they’ve gotten up to/would possibly fight dirty, gandalf is gandalf so while weapons are out of the question i suppose that depends on if magic is involved. i don’t think i could take him without magic even if he IS old because he’s a very large guy, but maybe
it would be my knuckles against Frodo’s baby soft poet hands, plus i’ve got the additional height and fighting experience. i just think that he would be the easiest to win against in hand-to-hand combat out of the rest of them. also he isn’t real so he can’t offer a rebuttal to my claim
you’re absolutely correct BUT wanting to fight Frodo makes you a monster D:
this has nothing to do with WANTING to fight Frodo, i just think he would be easiest for me to beat in a fight with no weapons. unless he utilized his very large feet, but i think he’s too polite to do that because it’s a fist fight and that would be considered playing dirty
for someone who doesn’t want to fight Frodo you sure have put a lot of thought into fighting Frodo……….
OP is wrong though: you fight Pippin.
First off, Pippin has it coming, so you won’t be fighting your conscience at the same time.
Secondly, Pippin is a spoiled rich kid. He’s no less gentry than Frodo is, but Frodo works out and is shown to have better stamina, at least at the outset. Pippin is also both the stupidest and the slowest of the hobbits. They both nearly beat one (1) troll, so that’s comparable, but Pippin appears not to have got a single hit in against the orcs that captured them while Merry was cutting off hands like a boss. Pippin also straight-up tell Bergil that he’s not a fighter.
Also there’s a nonzero chance that Frodo will just straight up curse you (if the guilt of fighting Frodo isn’t enough if a curse by itself).
And, of course, if you try to fight Frodo, you will 100% end up fighting Sam, and he will wreck you (and you’ll deserve it, you monster)
Also: if you fight Frodo you’ll have a very angry Sam & possibly also the entire Fellowship to deal with BUT if you fight Pippin they will probably cheer you on.
Bold of you to assume one could attempt to fight Pippin and NOT instantly be killed by Boromir.
So here’s the thing - you absolutely DO NOT want to try and fight Frodo or Pippin because they are going to be protected by the rest of the Fellowship, which basically exists to stop asshole Big People from picking on the hobbits. Folk might talk a big game but when the chips are down, you are not going to lay a single hand on any of the hobbits. Either you’ll find yourself immediately fighting all four of them or else you’ll move to land your first hit and suddenly Aragorn will side-tackle you into the trees. And he probably hits like a freight train tbh.
So here’s what you do:
You fight Legolas.
The thing about fist-fighting Legolas of course is that you will lose. This is not a fight you’re gonna win no matter what. But Legolas has his standing competition with Gimli, so once the challenge is issued, he’s not gonna let anyone else step in and fight you either. No one is liable to volunteer on his behalf, either, so you will only end up fighting the one member of the fellowship. If you are lucky he might also take his shirt off. Bonus!
Anyway.
Legolas will mop the floor with you, but he’s also already convinced you’re weaker than him anyway because you’re not an elf, so he’s gonna go kind of easy on you. And when you lose he will be all snide and superior about it, which means everyone in the fellowship is gonna sympathize with you, and Gimli will probably challenge him on your behalf afterwards, but here’s the key thing:
You will have lost a fist-fight to an immortal warrior prince.
That’s a way better loss to cop to than that time you tried to fistfight a pudgy gentlehobbit and got beaten to the point of unconsciousness by his gardener, yeah?
okay so tolkien tumblr is fast becoming my fave tumblr community thank you thank you all you are the true fellowship here.
Audrey says “fuck your gender roles”
This movie is super underrated.
Audrey is so underrated. How can you not love her?
I have a love-hate relationship with this movie.
On one hand it’s got awesome PoC characters who defy racial and gender stereotypes. It also discusses colonialism and how people tend to destroy indigenous cultures to obtain land and resources (which is why the crew ultimately decided a to pretend they never found Atlantis because they don’t want anyone else to try and destroy the culture).
But on the other hand, the whole plot is that Atlantis needs a white, cishet man to save it from extinction and for some reason he understand their culture and language better than they do.hEY FUCK YOU OKAY
MILO WAS THE ANTITHESIS OF WHITE SAVIOR
HE WAS A NERDY USELESS LITTLE SHIT WHO WAS COWARDLY UNTIL OTHERS FORCED HIM TO ACT
HIS ONLY STRENGTHS WERE HIS MIND AND HIS ETHICS
HE WAS THE PERFECT DUDE FOR THE JOB AND THE REASON HE KNEW BETTER WAS BECAUSE HE RIGOROUSLY STUDIED TEXTS THAT HAD BEEN LOST OR DESTROYED IN ATLANTIS BECAUSE KIDA’S FATHER INTENTIONALLY LET HIS KINGDOM LAPSE INTO DECAY AND OBSCURITY
DO NOT PULL THAT WHITE SAVIOUR BULLSHIT BECAUSE MILO WAS A DAMN GOOD DUDEI’ve been trying to tell people this for years. Also, what differentiates Milo’s experience from the white savior complex is his expectation and his attitude. When looking for Atlantis, the last thing Milo expects to find are people. He says the most they thought that they would find are carvings and pottery. And he would have been happy with just that.
And even when he finds the Atlanteans, he treats the culture and people with the utmost respect (peek the scene where the crew has their audience with the king). He never tries to interfere in the people’s way of life nor change them. He’s merely an observer fascinated with the culture/people and just wants to know more about them.
In most movies, the white savior comes into the situation with an attitude of superiority and only through his interactions with the native people (and a lot of times a beautiful native woman) is he humbled and then eventually brought in as an honorary member of the people. Milo never asks for thanks or wants to make a name for himself. He does what he does because he loves it and it’s a way to keep his grandfather’s legacy alive.
Yeah. Milo was a damn good dude.
And another thing about Milo that’s made evidenced by this scene in particular? He’s got respect for women.
He doesn’t ask why it’s a GIRL mechanic on the expedition, only why it’s a TEENAGER. Doesn’t question Kida’s leadership and knowledge when he meets her. (I can’t think of more examples off the top of my head but I’m sure they’re there).Milo is a wonderful Disney protagonist, and this movie deserves the underground love it receives.
(Source: stelmarias)
